2019-02-19

Episode 101 -- Vulnerability While Speaking With Sasha Laghonh


2-Minute Tip: Seek out Vulnerability

 

 

Vulnerability can be a powerful element in your speaking. Being vulnerable doesn't mean your weak. It's about having the confidence to acknowledge how you can grow today and how you have grown in the past. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable helps the audience connect with the most human aspects of your nature.

 

Post Tip Discussion

 

A lot of us got our first exposure to public speaking in school. It's a common theme that often sets the stage for how we may approach speaking later in life.

 

Sasha Laghonh moved nearly every year as a little kid and each new school meant standing up and introducing herself to a new group of kids.

 

It's a vulnerable time for a kid, and vulnerability is a theme that runs throughout this episode. It's not about being weak, but about exposes yourself so that you can have an impact on the audience.

 

We cover everything from vulnerability to boundaries to 90 day plans to the importance of gratitude and forgiveness.

 

Bio

 

Sasha Laghonh HeadSasha Laghonh ( laa-go ) brings over eighteen years of experience to the commercial and spiritual realm by working with private and commercial clients hosting diverse backgrounds and life endeavors. As a seasoned MBA professional, she also specializes in Organizational & Human Behavior which grants her a broad base from which to approach many topics. These tools drive her corporate career by executing diverse business strategies in complex and evolving environments. As a Business & Lifestyle Strategist she works with clients ready to transform their paths by offering customized services relevant to their needs.

 

To complement her career, she is a spiritualist hosting abilities that allow her to deliver intuitive insights derived from questions possessing various degrees of complexity. By applying these insights as a self-development tool, one can empower themselves by making better decisions with clarity and confidence. Sasha continues to share her craft with global clients through private sessions, professional groups and global media including print.

 

As a producer and author, Sasha's work is presented through various media appearances and private speaking engagements. As a frequent guest on FM/AM radio and worldwide platforms, including events, she educates audiences on business strategies, effective management & leadership, lifestyle choices, and spirituality. For pleasure Sasha enjoys traveling, teaching and raising awareness of various humanitarian efforts. To learn more, visit www.sashatalks.com.

 

Links

 

Sasha's Website

http://sashatalks.com

Book Sasha

booker@sashatalks.com

Sasha's Books

https://www.sashatalks.com/books.html

 

Call To Action

 

  • Check out Sasha's site at the link above to learn more about the work that she does.
  • Do you know someone who might find this interesting? Tell them to visit http://2minutetalktips.com/sasha or help them subscribe for free in the podcast app on their phone
  • Come back next week to hear from former pro baseball player and now life mapping expert Tim Pahuta
  • Don't get best…get better

Check out this episode!

2019-02-15

Episode 053 -- Making an Impact on the World with Stroke Survivor Pete Smith


I talk a lot about public speaking. Long time listeners to this show know that I also host a podcast about that topic where I help folks become more effective public speakers in as little as 2 minutes a week. Visit 2minutetalktips.com for more details.

I was listening to Grant Baldwin's show "The Speaker Lab" one day when he was interviewing a guest who's focus was on how you can build a life in such a way to have an impact on the world. The guest came to have this perspective sitting on the kitchen floor having just suffered a stroke. Of course, my ears instantly perked up, and I knew I wanted to have Pete Smith on Strokecast to share his journey.

There are a number of valuable insights in this discussion.

We talk about the importance of language. We get to define our own context and choose how we see the world.  Are you a stroke victim or a stroke survivor? Is this the end of life or the beginning of a new type of life? Am I an unemployed middle-aged brain damaged cripple or a young, entrepreneurial survivor sharing a story of adversity and helping others along their own journey? 

The words we choose to define our context can expand or limit our future. It's up to us.

Another thing that's important is the significance of sharing our stories to connect with one another. Pete shares his initial surprise about how when he started talking about his stroke, he got more audience engagement. Folks would come up to him after the talk to share their own stroke or stroke adjacent stories.

That's one of the reasons I started this show to begin with -- I want to help connect folks through the power of storytelling and sharing one another's stories.  I firmly believe that the growth of social media and the importance of representation in traditional media is rooted in a fundamental human need to be heard. To be seen. To have an impact on the world outside of ourselves.

Bio

Pete Smith HeadshotPete is an international speaker and coach in the fields of leadership, management, personal growth and development. His energetic, edgy, and interactive style is complimented by his ability to provide practical takeaways that actually work, while having a little fun in the process.

He is the author of Dare to Matter, which hit the best seller list in the Business Motivation and Self-Improvement category in 2017.

Having a stroke at the age of 35, Pete has since used that experience to inspire, educate, and entertain audiences throughout the world on the importance of pursuing significance in their personal and professional lives. As he says, “If you relentlessly pursue success and happiness in your life, you are settling for far less than what you were created for.”

Married to an incredible wife, proud dad of two amazing boys, and part-time chew toy for an Irish Setter, Pete resides in Arlington, VA.

Hack of the Week

Managing life, relationships, appointments, accessibility needs, etc. can be a challenge. The way we approach those challenges is up to us. Reframe the context in which you find yourself. Change the language in your internal monologue, and you can change the thing that you accomplish. You can change what comes from treatment, and you can change the things you encounter in the rest of your life.

Links

Pete's Website

http://smithimpact.com

Dare to Matter: Choosing an Unstuck and Unapologetic Life of Significance

https://www.amazon.com/Dare-Matter-Choosing-Unapologetic-Significance-ebook/dp/B01MZ80XBC

Pete on LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/petesmithsmithimpact/

Pete on Twitter

https://twitter.com/SmithImpact

SmithImpact on Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/SmithImpact/

The Speaker Lab Podcast

https://thespeakerlab.com/podcast/

Pete on The Speaker Lab

https://thespeakerlab.com/pete-smith/

2-Minute Talk Tips

http://2minutetalktips.com

Where do we go from here?

  • Check out Pete's website and book by visiting his links above.
  • Make an impact on folks around you by sharing this episode. Use the link http://strokecast.com/impact.
  • Choose the mindset that will help you extract value from this experience.
  • Don't get best…get better

Strokecast is the stroke podcast where a Gen X stroke survivor explores rehab, recovery, the frontiers of neuroscience and one-handed banana peeling by helping stroke survivors, caregivers, medical providers and stroke industry affiliates connect and share their stories.


Here is the latest episode of The Strokecast

2019-02-12

Episode 100 -- Rock on with Pat Roque


2-Minute Tip: Evaluate and Connect

 

Create a scoring sheet for your audience members, and ask them to complete in at the end of the talk. In the Learning and Development field, we call these smile sheets, and they are the first step in figuring out if training is effective.

 

In a speaking context, they can be a little different. One approach is to build the form in three sections.

 

Section 1 is a 5 category scoring rubric, and they audience members give you points in each 5 of those categories. Sure, this can be scary at first, but you won't know if you are successfully unless you ask. By using the same evaluation over time, you can eventually monitor trends in your scores. Are you getting better or worse? Did you make a change that impacted your score? This can be helpful to know.

 

Section 2 is a few open ended questions. This gives the audience a chance to say great things about you or offer testimonials. You can also find out what they think you did well or not well, and you can ask about what they wanted to see more of.

 

Section 3 is how you extend your relationship with them. Here is where you ask them to sign up for your newsletter, join a private Facebook group, call for a private appointment, hire you to speak at another event, etc. You give them the chance to ask for more of your content and to start a long-term relationship with you.

 

Post Tip Discussion -- Rock On with Pat Roque

 

Pat Roque rocks!

 

In fact, that idea is what her whole philosophy and work to empower folks focuses on. In this episode, she talks about how she uses a box of rocks to build custom talks and extend the talk months and years after she leaves the stage.

 

Managing your life and growth can be a complex undertaking so Pat breaks it down into 5 areas:

  • Family
  • Fun
  • Fitness
  • Finances
  • Fabulous career

 

That certainly makes personal growth look a little a bit easier, and the alliteration with the letter "F" is a classic an effective speaking tool.

 

Bio

 

Pat RoqueAlthough she founded her company in 1988, a midlife meltdown sparked her own pivot and her mess became her message. Pat and her box of 50 ROCKS have transformed lives and careers through her proprietary Rock On Success Coaching System and Mastermind. It sparked global keynote talks, coaching and she's now authored two books as an expert in helping folks figure out why they rock...and how they can tell their story to can serve the world in a bigger way.

 

Whether she helps 1:1, in group coaching or from the stage, Pat's clients gain confidence, leadership effectiveness, career fulfillment and a rock-solid future. Pat is a fierce advocate for strength-based culture, virtual teams, women’s leadership, diversity and inclusion at organizations including Novartis, KPMG, Konica Minolta and Bank of America. Her message impacts worldwide audiences as a top LinkedIn Career Coach and SHRM Preferred Provider. A passion is driving business through golf: Pat serves as a global brand ambassador for the LPGA #Inviteher initiative, and as a board member of several golf and health charities.

 

Pat juggles life in the "sandwich generation," quarterbacking work, marriage, aging parents, 2 college students and a rescue puppy, Bella. She lives a laptop lifestyle, working remotely from NJ and Myrtle Beach, SC.

 

Pat says, "Not only is my glass half full, but I'm grateful for the glass every day. Have fun and embrace these secrets that for sure can change the rest of your life!"

 

100 Episodes

 

I want to take a moment and acknowledge a milestone. This is episode 100 of the podcast. It's a big number and it took a long time to get hear. I hope you continue to find value for 100 more episodes and beyond.

 

If you've found the show has helped you become more effective, I'd love hear from you. Email me at Bill@2minutetalktips.com, or post a comment below.

 

Links

 

 

Call To Action

 

  • Why do you rock? Let us know in the comments below.
  • Check out Pat's site and the links above.
  • Prepare a post-speaking scorecard for your audience to complete.
  • Don't get best… get better.

 

2-Minute Talk Tips is the public speaking podcast that help you become a more effective speaker in as little as 2 minutes a week.


Check out this episode!

2019-02-08

Episode 052 -- Sex After Stroke


Podcast Milestone

This is Episode 52. It's the last episode before the show's 1 year anniversary.

I have been doing the show every week for a full year now. Many podcasts don't make it past episode 7. I want to thank all my guests and listeners for generously sharing your knowledge, your time, and your attention as we work to help grow the connections within the survivor, caregiver, medical, and Friend of Strokecast communities. And of course, I have to thank my girlfriend Cathy for her fantastic, support, patience and graphic design on both the show and my general stroke recovery.

And we're just getting started.

If you're new to Strokecast, please subscribe for free in your favorite podcast app.

Hospital Chats

About 2 weeks after my stroke, I was laying in my hospital bed and was finally able to start thinking more in the mid-term -- what was life going to look like when I left the hospital. What lifestyle changes would I have to make? What was going to be different? What should I stop doing, and what should I start doing?

My rehab doctor got all my vice related questions.

Could I continue to drink alcohol. She yes, but "Just don't drown your brain in it."

This is Washington so should I consume cannabis? She said, "If it's not already part of your lifestyle, now is probably not a good time to start."

I also asked about sex. Would it be safe after stroke? Her recommendation was, "Just don't fall."

She had a way of having nuanced discussions that were easy to sum up in basic directions like that.

I began working on this episode several months ago. It seemed like a good idea in the lead up to Valentine's Day. I began reaching out to my network of support groups, survivors, and professionals to find a guest who could talk about sex after stroke. The response I got was generally along the lines of, "That’s a great idea! Let me see if I know anyone." We tried unsuccessfully to make some of those connections, but they just didn't turn out.

There are some resources on line, but not many. There don't appear to be many professionals who specialize in helping stroke survivors navigate issues around sex and intimacy. 

I'd actually love to hear from our neuro cousins in the CP, MS, ALS, TBI, and other brain injury communities about how sex is talked about there.

So really the point I want to make here is that this episode will be a high level discussion. I'm not offering many detailed solutions. I do want to give you an opportunity to think about some of these concerns and communicate with the appropriate people in your personal and professional life to get the most out of that life. When it comes to sex and relationships, that's probably good advice regardless of whether or not you've had a stroke.

Framework for Talking About Sex

There are 7 areas I Talk about on the show:

  1. Safety
  2. Physical Factors
  3. Psychological Factors
  4. Medication Factors
  5. Contraception
  6. Relationship Changes
  7. Consent and Communications

So I don't know if I've solved anything with this post. I do hope that it helps you to open up your own personal discussion with whomever you ought to be having it. It's a discussion that many people agree needs to happen, but too often doesn't.

Sex will, of course remain a powerful force and continue to impact the dynamics of interpersonal relationships a survivor maintains. It doesn't just become moot because someone has a disability. That just changes the conversation.

Most importantly, I've taken my Doctor's advice and not fallen.

Hack of the Week

I like eggs -- fried, poached, scrambled, omletted, and more. Of course, post-stroke, I'm supposed to cut down on things that can raise cholesterol, like whole eggs. For healthy eating, it's not actually the entire egg that's a problem; it's the yoke.

So now, sitting in my fridge next to the eggs is carton of egg while. When I make what used to be a 3-4 egg dish, I use just one regular egg, and I make up the rest of the volume with egg white from the carton. I still get the taste and texture I want, and it's a lot healthier.

It gets better, though. Because I have use of only one hand, I have to crack eggs with just one hand on a surface that I shouldn't knock over. I can do it, but it's not easy. With the carton of egg whites I don't have to crack all those eggs myself. It's a heck of a lot easier to just pour from the carton.

Links

Intimacy After Stroke

-

American Stroke Association

https://www.strokeassociation.org/en/about-stroke/effects-of-stroke/emotional-effects-of-stroke/intimacy-after-stroke

Sex and Intimacy after Stroke

-

StrokeConnection

 

http://strokeconnection.strokeassociation.org/Mar-Apr-2009/Sex-and-Intimacy-after-Stroke/

Sex After Stroke: What Couples Need to Know

-

Saebo

https://www.saebo.com/sex-stroke-couples-need-know/

Sex and relationships after stroke fact sheet

-

StrokeFoundation

https://strokefoundation.org.au/About-Stroke/Help-after-stroke/Stroke-resources-and-fact-sheets/Sex-and-relationships-after-stroke-fact-sheet

How Sexuality Changes After Stroke

-

verwellhealth

https://www.verywellhealth.com/sexuality-after-stroke-3146001

Sex and Sexuality

-

National Stroke Association

https://www.stroke.org/we-can-help/survivors/stroke-recovery/life-style/relationships/sex-and-sexuality/

Intimacy and sex after a stroke

-

The Blue Room

https://theblueroom.bupa.com.au/manage-and-recover/stroke/intimacy-and-sex-after-a-stroke

Where do we go from here?

  • Read more about sex after stroke at the links above.
  • You can also share your thoughts about sex after stroke or with a neuro condition in the comments below.
  • Please share this episode with a friend, partner, colleague, or other party who might be interested in sex after stroke by giving them the link http://strokecast.com/sex.
  • And of course, as always, don't get best…get better.

Strokecast is the stroke podcast where a Gen X stroke survivor explores rehab, recovery, the frontiers of neuroscience and one-handed banana peeling by helping stroke survivors, caregivers, medical providers and stroke industry affiliates connect and share their stories.


Here is the latest episode of The Strokecast

2019-02-05

Episode 099 -- Be Authentic and Understand Temperament with Coach K


2-Minute Tip: Be Authentic

 

Present in a way that is true to yourself. Your content needs to resonate with you first, or it won't resonate with your audience. When you can share a message that you are on board with, you can convincingly tell your story and you have the best opportunity to move your audience to take the action you want them to take. And isn't that the point of all this?

 

Post Tip Discussion

 

A lot of my guests appear on other podcasts -- shocking, I know. Every show and host has their own perspective and the conversations are often unique. A couple months ago. I listened to some other shows an upcoming guest had been on, and I realized I needed to up my game and energy level to impress the guest. So I tried.

 

And it went -- okay. The guest was happy, and after editing the episode was solid. But it wasn't as good as it should have been, and I felt it at the time. And I was a little embarrassed at the end because I knew I didn't do as well as I could have. Because I wasn't myself.

 

I share this story because Evan Kubicek, AKA Coach K, is my guest this week, and fortunately, I was myself for this one.

 

Obviously we talk about speaking on this episode, and we also talk about sales and marketing. The focus of our conversation, though is on temperament and being authentic to who you are.

 

Evan Kubicek HeadshotCoach K helps folks understand their temperaments -- the core of who they are and how they work best. Being authentic to yourself is key to effective public speaking and core to professional success.

 

Coach K is a full time instructor at Indiana State University focused on Management, Leadership & Startups. He's a very proud Father of 4 boys and married to the wife of his youth for 15+ years.

 

As a certified temperament analyst from the Sarasota Academy of Christian Counseling he has used the tool for nearly 10 years across 4 continents with hundreds of people in 1 on 1 sessions.

 

Links

 

 

Call To Action

 

  • Visit Coach K's page and connect on social media at the links above to explore how you can find your own temperament.
  • Share this episode with a friend, colleague, or relative by giving them the link http://2minutetalktips.com/coachK.
  • Don't get best…get better.

Check out this episode!

2019-02-01

Episode 051 -- Author and Survivor Christine H Lee


Cover of the book Tell Me Everything You Don't RememberThis past fall, I read Christine Lee's memoir, "Tell Me Everything You Don't Remember." It's the story of her 2006 stroke and the recovery.

A theme through the book is one of isolation. She lost her short term memory, and she lost her ability to communicate. For the first time in her life she had to learn to listen to herself and trust her intuition. Her memoir is about her journey through that series of new, confusing experiences to the different life she leads today.

One thing she talks about is before going to the hospital, before realizing she was having a stroke, Aphasia was setting in. She lost the word for egg and could come up only with "shell bells." I'm not minimizing the pain of aphasia, but there is something beautifully poetic about that word substitution.

After I finished the book, I reached out to Christine on Twitter and invited her to be on the show. I'm delighted she joined us and now I'm thrilled to bring you this conversation with Christine Lee.

Christine Hyung-Oak Lee is the author of the stroke memoir Tell Me Everything You Don’t Remember, which was featured in The New York Times, Self Magazine, Time Magazine, and NPR’s Weekend Edition with Scott Simon. Her short fiction and essays have appeared in The New York Times, Zyzzyva, Guernica, the Rumpus, and BuzzFeed, among other publications. Her novel is forthcoming from Ecco / Harper Collins.

[embed]https://youtu.be/VayUXlw9fZc[/embed]

Passages from the Book

Here are some quotes that struck me as interesting, important, poignant, and/or beautiful.

I was a body more than anything else, because my mind was on break. My mind was at peace. All the chatter in my head—What should I make for dinner? I need to go grocery shopping, but maybe I should go do that after my doctor’s appointment, because then the groceries will stay cold instead of sit in a car, and the store is on the way home, and so I won’t have to backtrack, and wait, do I have enough gas? When was the last time I put gas in the car? What if I run out of gas?—all that chatter was absent. All the burden of planning, all the anticipation, all the worrying and fretting, the burden of thought itself, was gone those first few weeks of recovery.


With zero questions, I felt less helpless. “How are you feeling, Christine?” “I am fine.” I didn’t know what else to say. I was surprised that I knew those words, “I am fine.” I now understand why I did not know the words for “I need help.” I was not in the habit of asking for help. It had become a habit for me to say I was fine. It bothered no one when I said I was fine. It was thus easier for my brain to shoot out that automatic verbal response. Help, on the other hand, was a new concept. My brain could not build new things. It was busy repairing the old things. Help was difficult. Help was complicated. So, I am fine, I said.


I looked at the key in my hand and wondered where it would go. I stopped thinking about what a key was and how it would work and where it should go and released the key from my conscious mind, and before I knew it I’d opened the front door to set down my jar of spaghetti sauce on the counter. Like magic.


Worrying is an exercise in memory.


The mind and brain are different entities. The mind, or soul, is abstract. The brain, flesh and neurons. But the functions of the mind and brain are linked—a marriage of partners, each one distinct but also related and connected to the other. Without the mind, the brain is an organ that has no way to express higher-order thinking. Without the brain, the mind starts to make up stories.


Later in my recovery, when I was well enough to understand what had happened to me, to realize my deficits and become depressed about my stalled progress, when I wondered if my old life would ever return in any familiar form, I pondered taking a big dose of warfarin and then slicing my wrists.


I feel those first weeks of stroke recovery as a series of unfettered, perfect moments, the kind that I now seek through retreat or in yoga or music. I am filled with nostalgia for that period of time; they were a gift to me, a state of mind that so many people seek in their adult lives. I was brain-dead. So disabled, yet blissed out. This, in stark contrast with what was to come—a heightened awareness of my shortcomings, a darkness to counter the lightness of those early weeks of recovery.


Healing is exhausting. Plasticity comes at a cost. The brain, while it heals, does so at the expense of energy—I was always exhausted. I was still sleeping up to twenty hours a day. Sleep affects plastic change by allowing us to consolidate learning and memory. When we learn a skill during the day, we will be better at it the next day if we have a good night’s sleep.


In an ideal world, all I wanted was for someone to sit next to me quietly.


But to the outside world I looked like I was in pretty good shape. In fact, I was in pretty good shape, given only six months had gone by. I was functional. Functional enough to technically survive the rest of my life as I was. But I was also well enough to know that I was not fully recuperated. I wanted to thrive. Surviving was not good enough.

Christine H Lee Headshot

Hack of the Week

Make lots of notes.

Dealing with short term memory issues is tough. One way through it is to document as much stuff as possible -- tasks you commit to, people you meet, resources you'll need, that book you want to remember to order, the place you parked your car and more.

There are lots of ways to document these things. At the most basic, carry a small notebook and pen.

If you prefer a more digital experience, Christine recommends that you use your smart phone to send yourself an email. Use keywords in that email so late you can simply use the search function to find everything you don't remember.

 

Links

Christine H Lee Website

http://christinehlee.com

Christine's previous blog

http://JadePark.Wordpress.com

Christine on Twitter

http://twitter.com/XtineHLee

Christine on Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/christine.hyungoak.lee

Christine on Instagram

http://www.instagram.com/xtinehlee1

Christine's Mailing List

http://www.christinehlee.com/2016/07/14/mailing-list/

Christine's Buzzfeed article that started it all

https://www.buzzfeed.com/xtinehlee/i-had-a-stroke-at-33#2wt7yh4

Episode 008 -- Val Salva and the PFO

http://strokecast.com/pfo

Buy the book at East Bay Booksellers

https://www.ebbooksellers.com/book/9780062422156

Buy the Book on Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/Tell-Everything-You-Dont-Remember-ebook/dp/B01EFLYG UO/ref=sr_1_

 

Where Do We Go From Here?

 


Here is the latest episode of The Strokecast