The Flight Home

1. Plug in head phones
2. Turn on notebook
3. Launch Law and Order: Criminal Intent episode through TiVo To Go.
4. Discover corrupted audio on the show.
5. Make sure headphones are plugged into the notebook right.
6. Raise volume
7. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
8. Try another episode
9. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
10. Check software settings.
11. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
12. Check detailed software settings.
13. Fail to understand detailed software settings.
14. Try changing random things that might be related to sound.
15. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
16. Uninstall new Codecs.
17. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
18. Reset notebook to setting three weeks old when the damn thing worked.
19. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
20. Decide machine must be broken.
21. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
22. Give up.
23. Decide to write a book review.
24. Discover book is in the overhead blocked by tons of carry on baggage because I didn't think I'd need it.
25. Check to see if corrupted audio file went to Confession to redeem itself. No dice.
26. Hear corrupted audio on the show.
27. Realize I have another notebook I can try. Fire up other notebook.
28. Discover none of my USB flash drives are big enough to move the TV files from the broken notebook to the good one.
29. Give up completely and plug headphones into iPod.
30. Hear corrupted audio on the iPod.
31. Silently scream "What the hell?!" so I won't be asked to step outside somewhere over the mountains.
32. Rip the headphones off my head
33. Accidentally push the cable plug the rest of the way into the headphones.
34. Hear perfect audio on the iPod.
35. Try Law & Order: Criminal Intent again.
36. Hear perfect audio on the show.
37. Undo earlier "repairs"
38. Sit back and enjoy the first 5 minutes of Law & Order: Criminal Intent.

*Bing*

*Bing*

Ladies and Gentlemen, that tone means the Captain as turned on the "Fasten Seat Belt" sign for our descent into Seattle. Please turn off and stow all personal electronics at this time.

Check to make sure your seatback and tray table is in the full upright and locked position. Make sure your carryons are stowed in either the overhead compartment or completely underneath the seat in front of you. Make sure your seatbelt is fastened low and tight across your waist.

Flight Attendants will be coming through the cabin one final time to collect all remaining service items regardless of their contents.

We'll be on the ground shortly.

39. Seethe